


i wouldn't know where to start (sweet music)

by sylviewashere



Series: bemily week 2019 [2]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Bemily Week, Bemily Week 2019, Childhood Friends, Emily and Jesse as siblings, F/F, Jeca friendship - Freeform, Roommates, beca is a big idiot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-21 08:05:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18139589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sylviewashere/pseuds/sylviewashere
Summary: Beca's known Jesse and Emily for most of her life. She never thought of Emily as more than Jesse's little sister, and then suddenly, they become roommates, and Beca thinking that Emily is cooler than she thought. Maybe a lot cooler.





	i wouldn't know where to start (sweet music)

**Author's Note:**

> apparently i've decided all hozier songs are bemily

It started when Beca began attending a new middle school. She was in seventh grade at the time, and her parents had just divorced. She moved with her dad a few cities over and into a new school district. 

Adjusting for Beca didn’t take long. She didn’t have many friends before, she had no friends now. And Beca was fine with that. It meant less people who she had to explain why she was entering seventh grade in the middle of the year. She didn’t want any pity, she just wanted to move on with her life. 

Then they came barreling into her life. 

Like, literally. 

Beca was just letting her dog Sherlock - the joys of having an English Lit professor for a father - out in the backyard, and then suddenly she heard a loud gasp from one yard over. 

She’s noticed the trampoline next door before, but it had been too rainy for anyone to use it since they moved in. But she watches over the fence to see where the noise came from and sees a flash of brunette hair appear, followed by another gasp. 

“Jesse! A dog!” 

Beca really wants to just go back inside and avoid meeting whoever lives next door, but she’s not quite fast enough. Two face pop up over the shared fence - they must be standing on something - one of them Beca recognizes. She’s not alone in this, either. 

“Hey, dude!” The boy shouts. “You’re in my math class! You’re new.” 

“Yeah, I guess I am,” Beca shrugs. 

“I didn’t know we were neighbors! I’m Jesse,” he smiles. He points to the girl next to him. “This is my step-sister, Emily.” 

She gives Beca a little wave. Beca waves back. 

“I’m Beca,” she replies blankly. Jesse doesn’t seem discouraged by Beca’s cold attitude. Neither does Emily. 

“Can we pet your dog?” She asks in a excited whisper. 

“Uh…” Beca looks at Sherlock, who has decided to just roll around in the grass with his tongue lolling out. Not exactly as smart as his namesake. “Sure. If you want to come around the front--” 

Before Beca can even finish her sentence, the two are scrambling over the fence. Jesse lands on the ground first with a thud, and Emily follows, landing a little less gracefully. Sherlock runs over to both of them immediately, jumping on Emily, who squeals and immediately starts cooing over him and scratching behind his ears. 

“What kind of dog is he?” Jesse asks.

“What’s his name?” Emily asks at the same time.

“A labradoodle,” Beca answers them. “His name is Sherlock. My dad is a lit professor, so…” 

“I  _ love  _ him,” Emily says, giving Sherlock kisses on his stupid head. Then, she starts addressing the dog directly. “Do you solve mysteries? Yes, you do!” 

“So.” Jesse steps closer to Beca, but keeps at a distance that doesn’t make Beca completely regret telling them to come over. He seems to be a generally friendly person, from what Beca’s seen of him. “You’re new.” 

“You already said that.” 

“Why’d you move in the middle of the year?” 

There it is. 

“Parents divorced,” Beca answers honestly. At least she knows Jesse’s parents had gone through the same thing, so hopefully he wouldn’t ask too much. “Moved with my dad.” 

“Oh, that sucks. I feel you,” Jesse sighs. He looks over his shoulder at Emily, who is only sort of paying attention to them. She’s mostly playing with Sherlock, though. Beca smiles at how Emily’s already figured out how much Sherlock loves his belly rubbed. Jesse turns back to Beca. “Do you have any siblings?” 

“No, it’s just me. And Sherlock.” 

“Emily is basically a dog.” 

“I’m not, Jesse!” Emily yells. “If anyone is a dog, it’s you.” 

Beca wonders if this is what having a sibling is like. Mindless insults that don’t have any poison behind them. Jesse laughs at Emily, and she grins back. He looks at Beca with a sparkle in his eyes and tilts his head. 

“Do you wanna come over sometime? We can play video games.” 

“I don’t really play.” 

“Well, great! You can start!” 

Beca shrugs and gives a halfhearted “maybe” before Jesse and Emily’s mom calls them back over, telling them not to just climb over the neighbor’s fence. They apologize and say goodbye. 

Beca honestly doesn’t think much of it. But, the next day at school, Jesse makes a point to sit next to her in math. And at lunch. Emily waves at her in the hallway - they don’t have the same lunch period since Emily’s in the grade below them - and asks Beca if she wants to come over after school. 

And she does. She has a hard time saying no to Jesse’s charming smiles and Emily’s eager expressions. She honestly thinks that it will just be a one time thing, but somehow it becomes a weekly thing, and then an almost daily thing. 

Jesse somehow became Beca’s best friend. Something about his endless energy and friendliness balanced Beca out. She actually gained a few more friends that she definitely would not have made if it weren’t for Jesse’s begging that Beca join his friends at lunch. It beat sitting alone. 

Emily was a little bit of a different story. Beca didn’t really know her as much more than Jesse’s little sister. Sometimes they’d play board games together; but usually when Beca was over at their house, Emily just bugged Jesse and her while they were playing video games. She usually stayed quiet and watched, but she’d eventually get bored and bothered Jesse until he gave her a turn. And then Beca would absolutely destroy her. 

But that was about the extent of their time together. Emily always wanted to hang out with Jesse and Beca, but even Jesse’s kindness doesn’t extend to constantly hanging out with his little sister. Once Emily got to high school, she was part of the more popular crowd, and kind of fell out of wanting to follow the pair around everywhere. 

So Beca’s kind of surprised when Emily asked her if she could be her roommate. 

“I’m not going to be living on campus anymore,” Emily explains. “Since I have a job off campus, it’ll be easier. Plus, Jesse mentioned that you were looking for a roommate after Stacie moved out.” 

Of course, Beca agreed. It’s Emily. Her best friend’s little sister. How could she not? Plus, it’s true. She was looking for a roommate after Stacie moved in with her girlfriend, Chloe. Who’s coincidentally one of Emily’s best friends.

Maybe Beca should expand her circle a little more. 

Nah. 

It wasn’t anything special at first. They didn’t really talk much because they just weren’t home at the same time that often. When they were, they were most likely dead tired - Emily from classes and Beca from working a late shift at the radio station. 

Whenever Jesse would ask Beca how Emily was (as if the siblings didn’t talk almost every week also), she would always tell him, “Fine, I guess.” 

“Becs, do you not hang out, like, ever?” 

“We’re both busy, dude. Whenever we’re both home at the same time, we’re worn out as hell.” 

“Just watch a movie together!” 

“I can’t believe you just said that to me.” 

“Fine, watch TV, play cards, paint each others nails. I don’t care what you do. I just think you should hang out more!” 

“Why are you so wound up over this, Jess?” Beca questions. “It’s not like we hate each other or anything.” 

“Okay, don’t tell Em I said this,” Jesse lowers his voice to a whisper, as if anyone is listening to him other than Beca. “But she’s just been really stressed lately, and hasn’t been seeing her friends as much. You don’t have to be best friends, but can you try to look out for her? She works herself too hard.” 

Beca sighs, and chews on her lip. She has noticed that Emily always has her nose in a book and stays up through ungodly hours taking notes. It’s been a long time since she’s genuinely hung out with Emily. 

Honestly, she can’t even remember when it last was. 

“Okay, yeah. I’ll try to hang out with her more.” 

“Thank you, Beca,” Jesse lets out a sigh of relief. “It’s really been stressing me out, and I can’t do much since I’m out in L.A. Plus, it’ll be good for you, too.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I’m just saying, you’re not the most social when I’m not around.” 

“Touché.” 

So, Beca asks Emily if she wants to order pizza that night. Emily eagerly agrees, and offers to pay for half of it. They camp out on their apartment floor, Netflix playing in the background. It doesn’t feel too forced, but Beca still supposes she should be able to be more comfortable about someone she’s known for a decade. 

“This is new,” Emily comments after a while of small talk. “Us hanging out.” 

“Uh, yeah. You’re just always so busy.” 

“True,” Emily hums. “Do you remember the last time we hung out like this?” 

“Not really,” Beca says honestly. “It’s been a while.” 

“I think it was...” Emily ponders for a moment. “Probably my 16th birthday party.” 

“Oh yeah! We played truth or dare.” 

“Yep,” Emily looks away from Beca, seeming embarrassed all of a sudden. She starts giggling a little. “Remember what Stacie dared us to do?” 

Beca furrows her eyebrows. She hasn’t thought about that night since basically the day after it happened. She tries to reason it out. Stacie has and is the type to dare people to do things like strip or…

Oh. 

“Stacie dared us to kiss.” 

Emily nods and bites her lip. Then she starts laughing again, looking anywhere in the room but at Beca. “High school was weird, huh?” 

Beca suddenly remembers that moment extremely well. Like it never even left her mind. Teenage Emily moving toward her, looking nervous and blushing so hard Beca thought she was going to pass out. Beca remembers whispering to her, low enough so only Emily could hear, telling her that she didn’t have to. She also remembers kind of wanting it. Wanting to taste the shiny lip gloss that Emily always wore. The kiss was fast, of course. But it left both Emily and Beca blushing. 

“Yeah. Weird.” 

They don’t say much else. Emily leaves to go to study more soon after, saying she has a quiz tomorrow. Before she steps into her room, she pokes her head around the doorframe. 

“Do you want to do this again next week? Maybe get chinese food?” 

Beca quickly agrees. 

It soon becomes a weekly thing. Sometimes, they talk endlessly, ranting about something that happened at work or something someone said in Emily’s class. Other times, they just eat and chill, shoulder to shoulder, watching whatever sitcom Emily’s currently obsessed with. 

Beca starts to look forward to their nights together. One night, she suggests that they play Mario Kart, and Emily teasingly says, “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather play with Jesse?”

“Haha, cute,” Beca sneers, tossing Emily a controller. “I’m Dry Bones.” 

“I wanna be the mushroom baby.” 

“...Toad?” 

“Yeah, him!” 

They even start hanging out outside of the apartment. Emily comes and visits Beca at the radio station. Despite the slight disapproval from her boss, Beca lets Emily come in the booth with her and hang out and pick songs. 

Beca goes to the campus library when Emily’s there at insane hours, bringing her extra snacks and coffee and walking with her so she isn’t alone in the dark. 

Beca never really expected to grow this attached to Emily. She’s started admiring her a lot, really. She’s an insanely hard worker and is probably one of the most humble people too. It always surprises people how smart Emily is as well. But not just book smart (she’s that too), but people smart. She just understands them to a degree Beca could never imagine. It doesn’t shock Beca that people always come to Emily for relationship advice - even though she herself is single. 

Beca sometimes even forgets that she ever thought of her as just Jesse’s little sister and not as her own pretty cool person.

Except when Jesse calls and asks how Emily’s doing. 

“Do you ask Em how  _ I’m _ doing, or do you just not care?” Beca asks, rolling her eyes. 

“I care how you’re doing, but you always just say fine. I figure we’re past the point where I have to pretend that I don’t know you hate small talk.” 

“Fair. She’s doing great,” Beca tells him honestly. She wonders if Jesse can hear the smile in her voice. “Really great.” 

Apparently she zones out for a moment, because Jesse says, “Hello? Earth to Beca?” 

“Oh, sorry.” 

“You sound weird.” 

“What?” 

“You said that weird. Like really happy and stuff.” 

“I can be happy, Jess.” 

“I know, I know. But it’s different.” He pauses for a second, then gasps. “Are you seeing someone?” 

“No,” Beca scoffs. “You know I’d tell you about it.” 

“You better.” 

Whatever. Jesse is always hounding her about getting out there and dating. She just didn’t do much aside from work and hanging out with Emily nowadays. Stacie gave up on setting her up on dates a while ago because they were always super awkward and left Beca feeling useless on the couch by the end of it. 

She didn’t even think about dating anymore, and she was fine with that. 

Jesse’s comment lingers in her mind for a few days, though. He sounded so confused as to why Beca seemed so happy. Why? He’s known her longer than anybody - if he thinks something is up, then maybe something actually is up. Beca’s not exactly the greatest at feeling out her own emotions. 

It must be more obvious that it’s bothering her than she realizes, because Emily kicks her gently under the table of the coffee shop. 

“Earth to Beca, do you copy?” 

“Huh? Sorry.” 

“It’s okay. You’re thinking pretty hard over there. Something bugging you?” 

“Nah,” Beca lies. “No big deal.” 

“Okay, well,” Emily scans Beca’s face carefully. “You can talk to me if you want.” 

“I know, Em. Thanks,” Beca smiles. 

“Of course. Love you.” 

“Love you too.” 

It doesn’t hit Beca until later that night. Emily’s fallen asleep on the couch next to her, in the middle of a Queer Eye marathon. She’s thrown her long legs over Beca, and is slumped in the corner of the couch in a way that can’t possibly be comfy. 

Beca’s first thought is that she looks so cute like this.

Her second thought is, “oh, shit.” 

So, Beca’s never really been great at knowing if she’s into somebody. She’s only dated a couple of people, and it kind of took her awhile to get to that point. It was Jesse that pointed out that when she likes someone, she spends a lot of time with them. 

It’s always obvious to everyone else, because Beca tends to be such a loner most of the time, and when she hangs out with friends, it’s usually as a group. She doesn’t spend a lot of one on one time with people unless she really likes them. 

It’s amazing how long it took Beca to realize that she may be into Emily. She suddenly feels extremely bad about it. 

This is Jesse’s little sister. Her best friend’s little sister. Isn’t there some kind of code against that? Is that a thing? Is this allowed? 

Oh, god. Does Jesse know? Is that why he was being all weird? 

Jesse can’t know. 

But she has to tell someone to see if this is actually what she’s feeling. 

Who would she usually go to for this? 

Jesse. 

Shit. 

Okay, she can do this on her own. It’s fine. Just go through a mental checklist. 

_ Do I like spending time with Emily? Check.  _

_ Do I enjoy Emily’s company, even outside a social setting? Check.  _

_ Does Emily’s company make me happier than spending time by myself? Check.  _

_ Do I find Emily attractive? Check.  _

_ Have I ever thought about kissing Emily? No.  _

_ Wait, scratch that.  _

Beca remembers when Emily started wearing a lip gloss similar to the one she wore in high school when they kissed. She remembers not being able to avoid looking at Emily’s lips. 

_ Okay, yeah. Check.  _

Emily starts to wake up, and Beca panics. She instinctively pulls away from Emily, moving to the other side of the couch. Emily, half awake, still manages to notice. 

“You okay, Beca?” 

“Hmm?” Beca tries to act natural. “Yeah, yeah. I’m coolio.” 

“Something’s bothering you.” 

“What makes you say that?” 

“You just said you were ‘coolio’. And you were all spacey earlier. C’mon, tell me what’s up,” Emily moves closer to Beca, leaning in and placing a hand on Beca’s leg. Has Emily’s touch always made her feel so warm? Actually, yes. But Beca just thought Emily had really warm hands. 

God, she’s so stupid. 

Emily looks at her with worried eyes, and it tugs at Beca’s heart. She doesn’t want Emily to worry about her. This feeling clearly isn’t going to just go away. They’ve been attached at the hip for months now, and it would only get worse. 

Beca takes a chance. 

“You have to promise you won’t tell Jesse.” 

“Okay?” Emily looks even more confused now. “I promise.” 

“I think I may be into someone,” Beca says, half under her breath. 

Emily freezes for a moment, then relaxes again. “Oh, really? That’s great. Do I know them?” 

“Yeah, definitely,” Beca would laugh if she wasn’t holding her breath. “Like, super well.” 

“Who?” Emily’s eyes widen with panic. “Oh my god, is it Jesse?” 

“God, no!” Beca practically screams. 

“Oh.” Beca can see the wheels turning in Emily’s head. “Who then?” 

Both of them are holding their breath now, and Beca’s extremely aware of how close they are. Her gaze unconsciously moves to Emily’s lips, and then quickly back up again. She doesn’t know if Emily caught the glance or not. Finally, Beca lets out a deep breath. 

“You. It’s you, Em. I’m into you.” 

Emily’s lack of immediate response makes Beca want to die. The wheels are still turning in Emily’s head, like she didn’t quite hear Beca. Beca wants to take it back, shovel the words back into her brain and bury them for the rest of time. She wants to tell Emily to say something, anything. But her mouth has gone dry. 

She finally sees Emily’s eyes crinkle at the edges, the way they always do when she smiles really wide. Beca’s heart does a somersault.  

“I’m into you too, Beca.” Her voice is barely a whisper, like it’s a secret. Beca supposes it kind of is. 

“You are?”

“Yes,” Emily lets out a breathy laugh. “I thought it was super obvious. When I brought up the kissing thing when we first started hanging out. I was kind of testing the waters. I mean, I knew you liked girls. But I didn’t know if you liked this girl.” 

“Oh.” Beca bites her lip. This is actually happening. Beca notices that Emily’s lips shine faintly with lip gloss, and a sudden urge takes over her body. “Can I kiss you?” 

Emily looks surprised, but she nods quickly and pushes forward, meeting Beca halfway eagerly. Beca takes a moment to adjust to how enthusiastic Emily is, but they soon fall into a rhythm. A push and a pull. Beca pulls Emily closer, and Emily pushes her to lay on the couch. 

They’re left breathless after a few minutes, and Beca swears that Emily wasn’t always laying on top of her. Emily giggles and tucks Beca’s hair behind her ear. “You’re good at that.” 

“Thank you?” Beca says lamely, but she can’t help but smile with Emily looking down at her like that, hair flowing down like a dark waterfall above her. “You too.” 

“So…” Emily hums, twirling the end of Beca’s hair. “You said we can’t tell Jesse, right?” 

“Well, at least not for a little bit. Maybe we should go on an actual real date first, at least.” 

“Or we could stay in and eat pizza like we normally do.” 

“That sounds better, actually. Let’s do that.” 

“Also, I think I have to apologize,” Emily says sheepishly. “Jesse already sort of knows.” 

“...What?” Beca sits up, and Emily adjusts by sitting back on her heels. “We literally just kissed. Did you like, text him behind your back?” 

“No. But I did tell him I was super into you right after I moved in.” 

“Shut up,” Beca gapes. “He’s known this whole time? Is that why he wanted me to spend more time with you? I mean, I’m extremely glad, but I’ll kill him.” 

“I didn’t tell him to do that! I actually yelled at him for it,” Emily pouts. “I think he was also worried about me working too much. But he told me he wouldn’t butt his big head in.” 

“I’m calling him,” Beca grabs her phone off of the ground. 

“Right now?” 

“Shh,” Beca presses her finger to Emily’s lips. Emily tries not to laugh. “I’m on the phone.” 

“Beca?” Jesse picks up, and it sounds like Beca woke him up. “It’s like midnight, what’s wrong?” 

“You dick. You set me up.” 

“What?” He sounds like he’s about to fall asleep again at any moment. Beca glances at Emily, who’s taken Beca’s hand in hers and is running her fingers over her palm. When she notices Beca’s watching her, she brings her hand to her mouth and kisses her palm softly, giving Beca a tender smile. Beca suddenly doesn’t really care about talking to Jesse anymore. 

“You know what, I’ll call you later,” Beca says, not looking away from Emily. “I’m going to go make out with your sister now.” 

“Okay, have a nice ti--wait, you’re going to what?” Jesse suddenly sounds very awake.

“Bye, Jesse!” 

**Author's Note:**

> come talk to me on tumblr @rosadiaznypd


End file.
